Kategoria: Crime

#1925 Blue Velvet (1986)

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I hovered around Blue Velvet for a long time, aware of its stature as a seminal David Lynch piece, and being a fan of Twin Peaks. And speaking of which, there’s certainly similar tones in both. Both taking place in a small towns that seem ordinary until the veil is lifted, revealing a dark, intricate mystery underneath, and Lynch’s fascination with the darker sides of human nature is apparent also here.

Both also star Kyle MacLachlan, navigating through layers of surreal and often disturbing realities acting as audience surrogate through whose eyes we get a front-row seat to the unsettling, surreal events that unfold on the screen. The transitions between what’s peaceful and normal, to scenes of insanity and nightmare are well done and seem to come almost too near to the viewer.

Blue Velvet took me to places and to this bizarre world where you’re not quite sure what’s going to happen next, and I appreciated it more as an experience rather than your traditional movie. It’s one of those films that takes you to places and stirs up feelings very few movies can.

80s-o-meter: 70%

Total: 85%

#1917 Murder in Space (1985)

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Ok, so it’s a made for a TV movie that I was not to touch for some time, but as I had cravings for some scifi, I really don’t have too many options available to me at this point.

The concept is unique and interesting for sure: a spaceship with multinational crew is on its way back to earth, when a murder occurs, resulting a potential scandal, hostilities between nations, and of course a classic whodunnit situation on board the ship, trapped in space. And instead of being a movie about space and travelling, it is just that: a whodunnit where the location just happens to be in space.

Michael Ironside and Wilford Brimley make Murder in Space somewhat worth watching – but most other parts here fall very much in the mediocre TV movie domain.

80s-o-meter: 78%

Total: 42%

#1914 Penn & Teller Get Killed (1989)

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In the early 90s someone in the Finnish National Broadcasting company had the good taste to get the Penn & Teller special Don’t Try This at Home to the programming. It was completely new, something fresh, daring and funny. And I was hooked, becoming an instant fan.

So yes, of course I’ve seen Penn & Teller Get Killed. But for some reason I always thought it as an early 90s release.

Written by the Penn & Teller themselves, the movie looks very much like them. There are tricks, pranks, revealing hoaxes, something of a plot and lots of black humour. In fact, the whole premise of the movie is based on the black humour as Penn jokingly states in national television how he wished someone was trying to kill them – something that soon becomes a self granting wish.

The movie might have been better if given to hands of a professional writer, but would not likely have reflected the duo as well as this one. Same goes for the melodramatic ending, filled with that pitch dark dark humour we’ve come to expect from these two magicians.

80s-o-meter: 91%

Total: 80%

#1885 A Stranger Is Watching (1982)

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I’ve loved Rip Torn’s work from the 80s to date, so seeing him in this earlier role as a kidnapper in A Stranger Is Watching was a mixed bag for me.

Behind his grumpy facade for me there was always something endearing in Torn, but there’s nothing of that in this role. In fact, the role of a kidnapper feels like a side role that anyone could have played, and I kind of wished they had as seeing him in the role was more of a distraction than enjoyment.

Other than that A Stranger Is Watching is a bit outdated, but still gripping thriller worth watching. It plays out a bit differently from other similar movies, and the steamy bowels of New York metro tunnels serve well as the location that the camera and viewers alike love.

80s-o-meter: 71%

Total: 63%

#1880 Beverly Hills Brats (1989)

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Right off the bat: is Beverly Hills Brats a good movie?

Well, it could be if you are 6-9 years old, but for myself I cannot really say. The movie is rated as PG-13 most likely due to some foul language, but really feels like targeted to kids. It is kind of a shame since the necessarily building blocks for a satire of filthy rich Beverly Hills family seems to be present, but put together in a very dull and predictable way. Again, as the movie was made for infants in mind.

Martin Sheen as the cosmetic surgeon does his best to keep the movie alive, while Peter Billingsley performs his trademark role straight out of Christmas Story. Probably the funniest side of the movie is seeing totally indifferent Burt Young sleepwalk through the entire movie.

80s-o-meter: 90%

Total: 38%

#1870 Tricks of the Trade (1988)

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I had consciously decided to exclude made-for-TV movies from my reviews (partly because many of them lack posters), but this one inadvertently escaped my notice—and, surprisingly, I was quite content that it did.

Tricks of the Trade stands out as one of the superior made-for-TV movies, where the constraints of a limited budget aren’t glaringly obvious, presenting a film that holds its own among B-list ’80s comedies. The narrative also has compelling elements: a seemingly perfect Beverly Hills marriage comes to a shocking end when the husband is murdered while visiting his secret prostitute girlfriend. Now facing danger, the unlikely duo joins forces to unravel the mystery.

The plot cleverly twists the classic cop movie trope, pairing two vastly different characters forced to tolerate each other and collaborate to outsmart the villains. For the most part, this dynamic is effective. However, there was potential for this to be developed into a theatrical release with somewhat sharper writing and I felt the writers didn’t fully exploit the comedic opportunities presented by the contrasting backgrounds of the two leads. As a result, the humour only hit the mark half of the time for me.

80s-o-meter: 90%

Total: 75%

#1797 Tough Guys Don’t Dance (1987)

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Not to be mixed up with Tough Guys, released just one year earlier, the cryptically named Tough Guys Don’t Dance makes an attempt to create a neo-noir thriller movie in the vein of old noir classics, but ends up mostly known for its ”Oh God! Oh Man! Oh God! Oh Man!” scene that has since become a modern meme classic.

I see good aspects here as well; I like old film noir thrillers with femme fatales, caricature-like baddies, chilly and rainy coastal settings like in Key Largo. I even like to an extend a film having style over substance, if the atmosphere is good enough to suck me in. In this sense Tough Guys Don’t Dance gets quite close. If the directing was any better and the plot didn’t feel as convoluted with tons of people coming and going without proper introductions, this could have been an ok take on the subject.

But, unfortunately Norman Mailer – who also wrote the original novel – decided to direct this thing on his own, and similarly to the Stephen King’s own film work, the skill of weaving a movie to a comprehensive package was really not one of Mailer’s strong suits.

80s-o-meter: 85%

Total: 43%

#1794 Family Business (1989)

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First of all, let it be known that if I had Sean Connery, Dustin Hoffman and Matthew Broderick to my avail, Family Business is not the movie I would have made.

That being said, let’s see what we have here. A quite mediocre and far fetched crime comedy about three generations of men whose grandpa is something of a small time thug, and the father is a recovering criminal, now a jefe in the meat packing industry. Three of them decide to go ahead and do a heist for some experimental science stuff, and of course it doesn’t go as planned.

The following events kind of tie the broken family together, but in a way that’s never satisfying, or something I could take with me as a memory or a lesson for life. Life your own life and don’t do what your gramps wants, maybe?

80s-o-meter: 75%

Total: 60%

#1791 The Census Taker (1984)

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As per usual I did not check any information of The Census Taker before watching it. It was therefore that the first events of the movie took me totally by surprise, and made the viewing experience much more interesting to watch compared to having known what to expect here.

I will not spill the beans either here – other than stating that the movie gets weirder and weirder as it goes on. In a totally good way, that is.

After the interesting build up The Census Taker it felt to me that the writer did not know himself how to conclude the story and thus the movie starts slowly losing its momentum towards the end, finally concluding in a quite unsatisfactory way that feels something of a panic decision.

80s-o-meter: 85%

Total: 62%

#1783 Little Miss Marker (1980)

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I don’t know how great of a movie the original 1934 Little Miss Marker starring Shirley Temple is, but based on this 1980 version I really can’t see anything that warrants a remake – other than the team’s interest in nostalgia, that is!

More bizarrely, the movie is not even brought to the current day. But maybe the story of a gambler giving her daughter as a collateral to bet on a horse race would not fly today as it already seems quite implausible in the 1940s. But so does everything else in the movie, especially the love relationship between the characters played by Walter Matthau and Julie Andrews, and the denouement of them forming a family of some sorts.

On the positive side Matthau is probably the best actor of the era for the role, and his trademark grumpy tone makes his slowly evolving attachment to the now orphaned girl quite touching at best.

80s-o-meter: 5%

Total: 37%

#1759 Stormy Monday (1988)

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Stormy Monday is a movie shot in the UK with two Hollywood actors, Tommy Lee Jones and Melanie Griffith. The story follows a shady American businessman named Cosmo, played by Jones, who arrives in Newcastle during a business event welcoming investors from across the Atlantic. Meanwhile, Brendan, a janitor at the Key Club, assists a nightclub owner Finney – played by Sting – against Cosmo’s henchmen while getting involved with Frank’s girlfriend, Kate, played by Griffith.

By far the best asset of the movie is its stunningly beautiful cinematography by Roger Deakins, with saturated blues and neon reds of nightclub strips and the blaring red, white, and blue of American business hype. But, as the rest of the movie falls short of the level of this cinematography, Stormy Monday is ultimately style over substance – but it’s stylish, alright!

Despite the promising premise of a thrilling film noir caper, Stormy Monday falls short. We never get to understand why Cosmo is so interested in a nightclub in Newcastle, while being so inept in getting it to his hands. Jones is supposed to be the top-billed star here, but it’s ultimately unclear what he’s doing in this movie as he’s more a source of campy fun than real menace. Sting holds his ground well as the little spoken owner of a night club, and Griffith performs admirably – although this is not the role she will be remembered for.

80s-o-meter: 60%

Total: 52%

#1727 Incident at Crestridge (1981)

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Woman moving into a small town located in the Western region of the USA faces ineptitude and corruption of the local law enforcement system and campaigns to become the new sheriff with the mission of rooting out corruption and to provide a sense of safety and security to the community that had been missing for years.

As with made for TV movies the theme of the movie is a bit different from what you’d normally see in movies with a theatrical release, and here also her struggle against the powers that be is interesting to watch.

On the downside Incident at Crestridge suffers from being very much a made for TV movie, and in its style and pacing reminds more of a long episode of some TV series of the early 80s, rather than a cinematic experience you’d go to see from a big screen.

80s-o-meter: 71%

Total: 60%

#1723 Homeboy (1988)

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Mickey Rourke of late 80s, early 90s was something else. I first witnessed him in Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man and he totally blew the then 12-year-old me away with his absolute laidback coolness, and left Don Johnson playing the second fiddle.

For those who loved Rourke in Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man, Homeboy offers much of the same. Both feature Rourke playing a tough, rebellious, anti-social, anti-hero characters who living in the outskirts of law. Heck, they’re even both drawing naming inspiration for Rourke from popular brands (here being called Johnny Walker).

As for the movie, yeah – it works. Rourke plays a has-been boxer with problems of setting into the society, and befriends a small-time crook played by Christopher Walken, also past his prime who still wants to be someone no matter what it takes. Rourke manages the hard role of playing someone unsocial and unlikeable, but still manages to make his underdog character someone we’d wish to his break.

80s-o-meter: 71%

Total: 78%

#1662 Prime Risk (1985)

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The poster for Prime Risk makes a bold comparison to War Games, stating this movie will make it look like ’kid stuff’.

The reference is not unfound as prime risk successfully draws from its paragon, presenting us a similar setup where youngsters’ mostly innocent tomfoolery turns out something much more than they originally bargained for. In Prime Risk, it’s hacking credit cards that leads to a plot of a hostile nation aiming to crash the U.S. monetary system.

What it comes to hacking and peeping behind curtains of state secrecy and international politics, Prime Risk is an excellent contender to War Games, only taking a few missteps towards the end by turning more into an action packed agent movie rather than what War Games ingeniously pulled off. Still, anyone who enjoyed War Games will find a lot to be loved here.

80s-o-meter: 87%

Total: 84%

#1647 Die Laughing (1980)

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A horribly disconnected effort, Die Laughing throws in a little bit of everything into the mix without ever finding its own tone of voice.

How disconnected? It genuinely felt like watching an episode of some random late 70s afternoon TV series that just keeps aimlessly going on, and on, and one. The boring action is padded with even more boring sections of the main character performing songs in auditions – another aspect of the movie that felt totally artificial and plastered on.

Die Laughing can really only be recommended to those who want to relive the worst of the 70s television.

80s-o-meter: 12%

Total: 2%

#1645 Atlantic City aka Atlantic City, USA (1980)

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Atlantic City is a movie about transition periods and change. Sally is learning the ropes to be a dealer to be able to leave to Monaco to work on a casino. His former husband, now with Sally’s sister has arrived at the city to makes some money selling drugs, and they run into Lou, a small time old crook looking forward to finally becoming the big shot gangster with the money and a woman he could show off to his Florida pals.

And all this is taking place in Atlantic City that is going through sizeable changes where hotels and casinos of the old glory days are demolished to make room for new buildings.

The real gem in Atlantic City is the interesting array of characters with real yet a bit childish and silly aspirations, and in this sense the movie manages to positively surprise time after time: we don’t have to relate or even like the characters to be able to sympathise with their dreams.

80s-o-meter: 63%

Total: 87%

#1618 Popeye Doyle (1986)

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Popeye Doyle is not actually a movie, but a movie length pilot for a TV series based on early 70s The French Connection starring Gene Hackman.

Like most people, I watched Popeye Doyle due to Ed O’Neill playing the lead part, but O’Neill really does not bring anything of himself into the role, like he famously did with Married With Kids, and multiple other comedies that followed. There’s nothing really that bad about the pilot, but it’s just so uninspired and average that it never manages to capture the attention.

The series was never picked up by broadcasting companies, which in hindsight was a blessing in disguise, especially for O’Neill himself.

80s-o-meter: 61%

Total: 30%

#1564 Thief of Hearts (1984)

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The second collaboration between producer wizards Don Simpson and Jerry Bruckheimer responsible for such 80s gems as Flashdance, Beverly Hills Cop and Top Gun, Thief of Hearts failed to find its audience in the box office.

The story of a thief falling in love with one of her victims and using ill gained information to win her heart over does not reach the epic levels of Bruckheimer & Simpson’s top movies, but the story is still unique and interesting – basically nothing like I’ve seen before.

There is a moment of bad writing though when the couple finally clashes, as it really feels forced and out of character for the thief figure. But the ultimate plot twist (for the lack of better wording) manages to fully redeem the movie, making for one a totally satisfying finish to the movie.

80s-o-meter: 91%

Total: 80%

#1563 Extremities (1986)

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Well, here’s a weird sort of screen chemistry ongoing: Extremities is a tragic movie of horror of the events that unfold when an intruder enters the home of a woman, with the intention of performing sexual (and deadly) violence on her – and it therefore feels odd to say, but the leads Farrah Fawcett and James Russo actually go well together on the screen.

Extremities is rooted in female revenge movies genre first capitalised in I Spit On Your Grave (1978) and continued in the 80s with the likes of Naked Vengeance, Ms .45, Extremeties and The Ladies Club. But similarly to the recent Positive I.D. (1986), Extremities bravely wanders off the trashy path of the genre to try something new.

The exploitative revenge porn aspect is still there, but here the heroine stops to think about the morals of her vigilant act as she balances on the very verge of the point of no return, realising she’s damned is she don’t and damned if she does. It’s this part that totally make Extremities worth checking out as it begs us as the viewers to ask ourselves those very same questions.

80s-o-meter: 85%

Total: 85%

#1561 Lassiter (1984)

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Lassiter is a hit-by-the-handsome-stick gentleman cat thief living in London on the verge of WWII that ends up recruited against his will by FBI to break into the heavily guarded German embassy to steal gems from the nazis.

The plot puts further pressure on Lassiter and his relationship with his love interest (Jane Seymour) as he first has to seduce the nazi femme fatale (Lauren Hutton) to gain access to the base.

40-year old Tom Selleck handles the role with expected charisma and the movie portrays well the era – or at least the movie version of it – without redundant underlining or overselling.

80s-o-meter: 5%

Total: 73%